How did Eric Clapton's son fall to his death? He crawled out the window.

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Did you hear about the toddler that was playing on the swing? He got abducted.

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Knock knock who's there? A serial rapist, now open up. hmmm... Ok... 3 Days passed before they found the serial rapist dead.

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How did bob survive the explosion? He wasn't at the explosion.

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What's worse then ten dead babies being nailed to a tree? Being the one to take them down.

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what do you call a retarded italian Niko

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Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

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Passing by

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Whats worse than breaking your toe? Being raped

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Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

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what's worse than one bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? the holocaust. What's worse than the holocaust? three bee stings.

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Why do Pelicans stand on one leg? Because if they stood on none, they'd fall over.

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Why did the black man buy a gun?? He enjoys hunting legally

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"Nice pair of crocs" said nobody

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he was dead.

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Excuse me sir, you wouldn't happen to have the time, would you?

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What do you get when you mix Fruit and Flys? Fries... or Flutes, depending on how many Flys your add.

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What do you call an German with a knife in his leg ? An ambulance as he has a serious leg wound and will soon die of blood loss

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Dude, you're never going to guess how stupid my friend Philip is! Really? What did he do?? Nothing. Philip will be attending the prestigious Princeton University next year and is therefore an incredibly intelligent human-being. You're an idiot for believing me.

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Why was the woman terrified of being screened by the TSA? Because she's embarrassingly obese, liked most Americans.

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Why don't women like to have penises? Evidently women have different tastes than men in what body parts they enjoy having.

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After waking up at the break of dawn, a man saw his dogs food dish was empty. In slight excitement for his dog to finally eat after his dish being empty all night, he called his dog in from outside, expecting him to go straight to his food dish like always. The dog walked by without noticing.

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What's yellow and smells like piss? Piss

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Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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