How do you get a small freckly boy to stop watching television. You turn off the television.

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Kid walks into principals office Principal: do you know why I called you down here. Kid: yeah, I punched a kid at lunch. Principal: that's not why I called you down here

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What do you call a kid with headgear and one leg? Names.

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If life gives you lemons, you can't really make anything because you lack the proper materials.

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A man goes to a Korean-owned dry cleaner to pick up his suits. They were impeccably cleaned at a reasonable rate.

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A man walks into a bra, he is an alcoholic and is destroying his family

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why did the stupid boy put his clothes on his valentines? because hes stupid

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What's really ugly and smells like a hampster? My hampster.

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how do you know a chinese person has been in your house? #1 your homework is done #2 your computer is upgraded #3 when you get home there still pulling out of your driveway

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Three women, a blonde a brunette and a readhead, jump out of an airplane without wearing parachutes. And this is why women should stay in the kitchen.

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What did Buzz say to Woody? A lot. There were 3 movies.

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Rock, paper, scissors, ebola

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What did the girl say when the boy asked her out? Yes.

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Whats worse than finding a worm guts in your apple? Being raped by a alien with no arms then passed on to his comrades to be raped for the rest of your life.

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Good for him. Thats wonderful!

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What did the Jew get for Christmas? A ride to a Concentrtation Camp.

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What's the difference between a terrorist and Bill Gates? One founded a successful software company, and the other commits mass murder of civilians for political gain.

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What's long and yellow? A yellow tube.

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What's worse than 10 dead babies nailed to a tree? 1 dead baby nailed to 10 trees.

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Stephen Hawkings was ice skating on the Eiffel Tower... then he woke up.

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Your friend is so gay that he came out of the closet and was accepted warmly by his friends and family for who he is a human being.

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why are black peroples noses so big ? because thats where God held them when he spray painted them

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Whats the difference between boyscouts and jews? Boyscouts come home from camp.

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So this guy's taking a hooker back to a hotel room, right? The woman turns out to be a federal agent investigating prostitution in inner-city inviornments, and the man is promptly arrested. He is now subject to a large fine and 90 days in a county jail.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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