Why do you almost never hear Americans complain about doing their laundry? Because they have a washing machine and they realize the majority of people in developing nations do their laundry by hand, using a wash board.

You know what's addicting? Heroine.

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"An alcohol walks into a man. He is a family and is destroying the bar." Says the drunk man to the bartender who wrote it on Anti-joke.com.

i just want thumbs up so i feel better about myself.....

Why did the chicken cross the road? to get to the other side.

Why don't women like to have penises? Evidently women have different tastes than men in what body parts they enjoy having.

An Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman went in a hot air balloon and had a magical afternoon that none of them will ever forget, except the Scotsman because he fell out during take off and is now in a coma.

A black man owns his own night club. He tells the white man to look out for his night club. The white man bangs his head. The black man says, I told you to look out, you have now bumped into my big club that I take out at night time.

What do you get if you cross a black man with a knife? Stabbed.

Why did the British boy win his talent show? Because he had straight teeth

Why was young Timmy crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

Passing by

A blond, a brunette and a redhead jump off a cliff. Which one hits the ground last? Depends on their weight and drag co-efficient.

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

A labrador, a chihuahua, and a great dane walk onto a bar. They are strays and were brought to the pound where they were more than likely put down or adopted.

what happened to the woman who was a prostitute? She was arrested because it is a crime

A man heard a thundering sound. It was thunder.

adam shagged katie lololol

Knock Knock Whos there? Me Me who? Oh sorry forgot you had alzheimers :/

What happens when you swallow a battery? You turn into one.

A man decides to commit suicide and jumps from the highest building in New York, he dies instantly on impact... the day was septermber 11th 2001, either way it was the end for the man

A guy walks into a bar. He's an alcoholic and it's destroying his family.

What kind of cat has no tail? Manx cat

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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