What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels.

Today I looked at a clock and realized that I was late.

Q: What do you call a fly with no wings. A: Dying.

Why can all black people dance? I have no idea, quite frankly I find that to be a insensitve racial stereotype.

Q: What did one raccoon say to the other? A: We do not know, as raccoons do not speak any human language. And no human being can understand or communicate with one.

Hey girl, the word of the day is "legs". So let's go home and research the origin of the term and possibly conduct other etymological studies.

A wise man once said, "Your life is your habits." So simple yet so true. My habits include: Breathing, having my heart beat, producing brain waves, and other regulatory bodily processes.

What did the moon say to the sun? "I am the moon."

What did Adam Sandler get for Christmas? Nothing, he is Jewish

Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers Roses are red, violets are blue I have Alzheimers

A black man enters a bar. The bartender approaches him, and asks "who will it be?" The black man pulls out a gun and robs the bar, he is then arrested ten days later.

A homeless man walks into a bar. The bartender felt bad and gave him $20.

What's black and white and red all over? The newspaper classified section after a man has abandoned long, futile job hunt. He has crossed out all the potential jobs with red ink. He was laid off due to the downturn in the economy and will now have to get food stamps, which is very embarrassing for a man who has worked to support his family his entire life.

a Chinese man an and a southern red neck walked into a country club and the chinese man got jumped and he left with no money

What do you call a black piano player? You call him a pianist who plays a black piano. However, that really doesn't seem all that short, so you may just want to call him by his name, whether it be Bob, Jeff, or Ronaldo.

What do caterpillars fear most? Death.

whats sixty-twelve and a half + one one sixty-twelve isn't a number

What does a black man, an Irishman, and a Jewish man all have in common? Male genitalia.

Someone said you sound like an owl Who?

Why can't orphans play baseball? They don't know where home is.

What's white on top and black on bottom? Society

Wanna hear a joke? Good, go ask a comedian.

What did one black guy say to the other black guy? I haven't thought of it yet....

Allie said yesssssssss!

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...