7am, waking up in the morning Gotta be fresh, gotta go downstairs Gotta have my bowl, gotta have cereal Seein’ everything, the time is goin’ Tickin’ on and on, everybody’s rushin’ Gotta get down to the bus stop Gotta catch my bus, I see my friends (My friends) Kickin’ in the front seat Sittin’ in the back seat Gotta make my mind up Which seat can I take? It’s Friday, Friday Gotta get down on Friday REBECCA BLACK FTW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

How many babies does it take to paint a house? Depends on how hard you throw them.

What do you give a small child when you don't have any candy? Nothing, you just kidnap them.

Yo mama so fat, she most likely wont live to 40

guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

What do you call a piece grass just mowed. A black person.

Why did the chicken cross the road? I don't know. I didn't ask him.

We didnt star the fire ...........

Laugh.

What is big, red, and eats rocks? Big Red that eats rocks. -For Abel

What did the prisoner say to the other prisoner? I am going to anally rape you.

Why did the monkey follow the tree? Because it was dead.

Shut up and stop laughing, Daddy's balls aren't gonna lick themselves.

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven raped and murdered his family.

Knock, knock Who's there? Europe Europe who? No, I'm not, you're a poo!

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chicken brains are not as large or developed as human brains, therefore preventing the chicken from making a logical decision, leading to it crossing a road with heavy traffic and eventually being run over by a semi.

What do you call a horse with out ears? A horse with out ears?

Why did the Jew fall off a cliff? Someone pushed him

wanna hear a good joke? neither do I

I have a crush on my dad.

Your mom is so fat, you might be dyslexic

Two guys walk into a bar... They sat down, had a few drinks and left without any incident.

Who's gay and has buttsex? Dan.

Why did the family go to Mexico? Because they were deported

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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