How many Germans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? 5.

A man finds an old lamp, rubs it, and releases the genie trapped inside. The genie grants him three wishes. So the man wishes for a million more wishes and uses them all wisely,

Why did the little boy drop his ice cream? He was ferociously raped by a bear.

A physician, an engineer, and an attorney were discussing who among them belonged to the oldest of the three professions represented. But neither one of them knew.

A turkey and a ham walk into a room. The ham says to the turkey "You're a turkey." The turkey in response says, "Yeah, well you're a ham!" They both then get their heads chopped off, as the room they were in was a slaughterhouse.

What's the difference between urinating on Lady Gaga and the american flag? It would be wrong to urinate on the American flag.

Hellooooo whos there? Its me fred Fred? A Canadian

What does this and this have in common , wait I was meant to put pictures up, aww

What's worse than dropping your icecream? Slavery

Jim and Dave walk into a bar. The bartender says, "what'll it be?" Dave is black.

What do you call a prison inmate with no arms or legs? John. That's his name.

Why don't they sell pharmaceuticals in the rain forest? Because it is to sparsely populated and not economically viable.

A pussy walks into a bar and orders a drink, the bar keeper asks " why are you such a pussy!" The pussy then says, "it's not my fault I'm a cat!" before getting run over

sometimes josh roberts sees how many things he can get in his bumhole befor is starts to bleed.

Sticks and stones can break my bones And words can make me lonely

Why wasn't the rabbit elgible to vote? Because rabbits aren't human beings, and only humans are allowed to vote.

Whats the difference between a Ferrari and a dead baby? I don't have a Ferrari in my garage

Why did the chicken commit suicide? To get to the other side.

What's better than winning the special Olympics? Not being retarded.

God is real

A black man walks into a bar. It turns out he is a notorious serial killer and he procedes to violently murder everyone in the bar.

Friend: "yo momma is so fat........ Me: My mom is dead

Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's a woman.

What object do bananas look like? Bananas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...