why are gays soo happy , becuase the dont have to listen to women

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Justin Bieber walks into a bar. <>

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A man from China is learning English and when confronted by a cop accidentally answers each question with one of the few words he knows, impugning himself in the process. The cop, not being a sociopath, realizes that the chuckling foreigner probably has no idea what he has just done and hands him a dictionary to help him cope with the drastic change.

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Yeah its just my way of saying that I appreciate you worrying so much about me, you are a sweet girl, Honestly I do not understand why the hell you guys are using Horsehead AntiJoke out of all places, there are far more terrible forgettable sites available, I mean this sites connection suddenly went from disgustingly terrible to fine and dandy, the Feds, the Interpol and even fucking Al Qaeda might be reading every single message, but there is no way in hell anyone can decipher the code format, if they could, they would have done it when I invented it sixteen years ago, Myself mind you, nothing subtle about me today apparently.

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what long hard and in a tight hole? a penis in a vagina

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Why does your mother not love you anymore? Because she was in a tragic car accident 5 years ago and is now deceased and is therefore incapable of love.

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Why was 7 afraid of 6? Because 6 accused him of cannibalism

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This message is boring. There is no joke. There is no punchline. You can stop reading now.

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What do you call someone who can't lose? Charlie Sheen

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I little 3 year old girl said to her dog "You're my best friend in the whole world" AND THEN THE DOG DIED!

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because he was being herded into a slaughter house to be killed, then packaged and shipped out to restaurant venders all across the country.

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There are two muffins in an oven. One says nothing. Muffins can't talk.

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Two guys walk into a bar, they are both alchoholics and beat their wives.

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Who am I? Your name is Harvey Jackson. Let's get you dressed so we can go downstairs for dinner. Nurse Holland will be helping you in a few moments.

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What is your favorite joke? I like bar jokes. Okay knock knock Who's there? A bartender A bartender who? A bartender walks into a bar but before he went through the door, he decided to knock on the door because this lame joke is so random.

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why'd the women leave the kitchen? her chain broke

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A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

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why did the black guy get testicular cancer? because he put his balls in the microwave.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue. I have Tourette's, Cheese on toast.

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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What do apples and bananas have in common? They're both red (except for bananas).

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How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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Three surfers paddle out into the surf. They had a pretty good time, except one of them got a shit ton of water up his nose.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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