What is Beethoven's favorite fruit? While Beethoven enjoyed many different varieties of fruit, he found strawberries the most appealing.

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Ted Haggard.

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Doctor- Mr. Smith I have some bad news for you. Mr. Smith- Just tell it to me straight. How long have I got? Doctor- Not long. Mr. Smith- OK.

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What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

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Why did the blonde stare at the orange juice? She was making sure there was enough sugar in it in case her diabetic son was to have an attack.

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What do you call a man or woman who has sex, records it on video, and sells the recordings for money? A porn star.

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Why did the ant cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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Why doesnt the ladder work? A ladder is an inaminent object therefore imcapable of having a job.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Segregation

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he.

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When life gives you lemons you get sugar and water and make some good lemonaide.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

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Zach Murfitt has a huge penis! Lol jk he has an inchy stryder

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Q: What do you call a dyslexic Irish man with no legs? A: Handicapped

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A Frenchman an Italian and an American were setting in a bar drinking and talking. The Frenchman said he made love to his wife five times last night. She said if I died she would never get married again. The Italian said said he made love to his wife ten times last night and that she said if he ever died she would kill her self. They asked the American how many times he made love to his wife last night. He said I'm a widower. She died in the 9/11 attacks.

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How do you kill a polar bear? You melt the polar ice caps and take a rope and choke it till it is out cold. You then put a plastic bag over its head and throw it in the water.

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Why are black people good at basketball? They practice

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I ate high protein foods and now my flatulence smells wrank.

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How many Amish people does it take to change a light bulb? None because they don't believe in technology.

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What'd the boy with no arms and legs get for Christmas? Just Dance 2 the video game

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whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

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Q: What do you get when Justin Bieber gets his own tv show? A: suiside!

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why?

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Why did Jack explode? He had a sneezier and his army friend Stephan threw a grenade at him because he was scared.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops