Oh. So his name's Brandon.

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If no means yes and yes means no, what is yes? Yes

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Why did the zombie go to school? Zombies do not exist and certainly do not go to school.

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roses are red violets are blue i dont give a damn how bout you

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Why did the baby cross the road? It was stapled to the chicken.

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What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

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Why don't blind men skydive? Because it would be unwise for a man who can't see to be jumping out of planes, completely unaware of his surroundings.

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A girl asked a guy if he thought she was pretty, He said 'No'. She asked him if he would want to be with her forever. He said 'no'. She then asked him if she were to leave would he cry, Once again, he replied 'no'. She had heard enough. As she walked away, tears streaming down her face the boy grabbed her arm and said.. 'Asking emotionally charged hypothetical questions that are completely irrelevant to the prior conversation is known as fishing for compliments. Except, your tears seem to reflect a more serious inner emotional neediness. I suggest you seek a psychologist.'

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Someone listens to an anti joke. They laugh.

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What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

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Why did the baby die? I killed it.

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Why did the black man fail math? He had missed many classes due to his mother's terminal cancer.

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What Do You Call A Swimming Banana.. Nothing Bananas Are Inanimate Objects Therefore It Would Be Impossible For It Swim

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Have you seen Helen Keller's back porch? Neither did she.

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What's blue and fluffy? BLUE FLUFF What's white and fluffy? A BUNNY What's pink and fluffy? PINK FLUFF What's brown and fluffy? A PORCUPINE

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What is the funny thing about suicide? nothing...

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asian drivers.

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he, he's blind.

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why couldent Hellen Keller drive? Because shes a woman.

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Two guys walk into a bar; A Mexican and a Canadian. The Mexican guy says "Bartender, give me a 2 shots of Tequila, por favor". The Canadian guy says "Bartender, give me a shot of Club and a Molson, eh". They continue to drink until neither can feel the crippling pain of their mundane lives - then they each leave the bar, walk home and sleep alone.

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What did the black man say to the Mexican? What a fine day it is!

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Hey i just F****d you, And this is crazy, Delete my number, And keep the baby!

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How do you confuse a Mexican? several large eggs

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How do you baby sit a black child? Entertain him with stimulating games to help with his cognitive growth.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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