What is the biggest lie in the universe? I love you.

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

Steve,Jerry and tom all go into the mens toilets, because they are men.

A grasshopper goes into a bar It is stepped on and crushed.

What's brown and green and if it falls out of a tree on top of you, it will kill you? A pool table

a drumset fell off a clif. Badoom ch.

Why was it sad that the kid was playing football? He had no arms and legs and he was the football.

There was a peice of lasagna. He knew he tasted great. So he constantly feared for his life.

Why was the lemon not feeling well? Because it had lemon aids.

Do you have liquid tape? No ( But he really did)

why was the girl screaming? She was getting raped from behind by her dad.

240

Kid 1 "Man this is the hardest poop i've ever taken." Kid 2 "Maybe it's because you ate the Happy Meal toys." Kid 1 "You know what? I think you're right. Commotion ensues as the toilet bowl fills with blood as the action figure has cut the inside of his large intenstine. He is screaming in pain. Kid 2 reacts quickly getting him to the hospital just making it in time before Kid 1 passes out. Thankfully he survives but has to get surgery. Meanwhile, the family dog Buster decides to drink the blood poop water from the bowl and dies from poisining.

This isn't a joke, but I'm going to ruin the fun of this site by clicking the thumbs up until I one day get onto the first page.

Why is Ian a virgin? Because he watches cartoon porn

Q: Why was six afraid of seven? A: Because of Kevin Spacey's chilling performance.

Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

What does A duck smoke? Quack

Yo mama so fat, she farts dust

Hey, I just met you, and this is crazy but get in the van

hi my name is 50 cent my mom swallowd 2 quarters befor i was born dsthgiudghyudgfuawyg

Knock Knock. Whos there? Death

without laughing try to say " i hate bubble" with a dull face

What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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