A ninja walks into a bar the bartender asks "what would you like?" The ninja says "i'll have two green eyes" the bartender says "we dont have green eyes this is america" so the ninja is so mad that he goes home and brutally beats his wife with a spatula.

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two guys walk into a bar, the third one ducks.

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why did the woman cross the road? to get groceries for making more sandwiches.

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That awkward moment when the moment is awkward.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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Roses are red. Violets are red. Tulips are red. My garden is on fire.

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? Because she has no arms Why can't she get back up? Because she has no legs Why won't anyone help her up? Because she's a woman.

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Life is an abstract object incapable of handing out gifts, thus if given a lemon by life you should go to a doctor to make sure you don't have an undiagnosed disease.

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Do is the Most Famous Line on youtube Answer- Do the Flop

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Why did the mormon walk into a bar? He didn't. Mormons don't drink.

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Patient: Doctor, I was cleaning my glass eye and accidentally swallowed it. Doctor: OK. Lean over and spread your legs. Patient: (Leans over and spreads his legs). Doctor: My God! This is the first time, in all my years of practice, that I've ever seen an asshole looking back at me!

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Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

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What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

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Dat ass, or dem titties? Your choice.

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What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

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What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

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Joe goes to the bathroom with someone in the next stall named Bill Bill: "Hi" Joe: "Hi" Bill: "How you doing" Joe: "Good" Bill: "You traveling" Joe: "Yes to Alabama" Bill: "Yeah, I got to go a guy in the next stall answering all my questions bye"

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what did helen keller say when she dropped a box on her toe. nothing. helen keller cannot speak

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What has two eyes, two arms and two legs........ a woman who lost her baby to a miscarrage.

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Why did the man eat his hat? Autism.

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What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

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I hate it when sentences don't end the way you expect them potato.

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horrible joke I I I I I I I VVV

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you want to hear a joke? sure... too bad

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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