A man walks into a bar and talks with his friends. One of his friends said " Hey, who farted?" When the bar closed, Joe realized it was he who farted.

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Q: What did one candle say to the other? A: Nothing, the mere thought of candles being able to possess the ability of speech is preposterous beyond any of the highest capabilities known to man.

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: Did you hear about the Polish Helicopter crash? The pilot and three passengers died.

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"Media Zombies" Sounds like the Nero I remember.

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What did timothy say after he went to go golf? - I just went golfing

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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There is a black man and a Mexican standing near the edge of a cliff, the black man turns to the Mexican and says, "We probably shouldn't stand this close to the edge of a cliff" The Mexican agrees and they step away from the cliff.

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What did the prostitute get after sex? Syphilis... she got syphilis

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Knock, Knock Who's there? A robber who will most likely kill you along with anyone else who will ruin their chances of becoming more wealthy off your most prized possessions.

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A teenage girl walks into a dark alley. She emerges on the other side completely unharmed.

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Christopher Reeve walks into a bar.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have AD i love squirrels

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What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

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I farted once. Haiti took the brunt of it.

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My butt!!!!!!!!

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how do you keep a black kid from jumping on the bed? pick up a parenting book ask him nicely try a time out not care because he's a kid and hes supposed to jump on beds?

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Whats funnier than a jew holding a nickel. Nothing. Jews are cheap.

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Q: why are black people good at basketball? A: because they practice

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KKK

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An owl and a squirrel are sitting in a tree, watching a farmer go by. The owl turns to the squirrel and says nothing, because owls can’t talk. The owl then eats the squirrel because it’s a bird of prey.

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Why does Snoop Dogg need an umbrella? Fo' Drizzle

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2 dogs one jar of peanut butter

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guess what my nephew said today? oh ya i forgot, hes dead..

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a dude goes to vegas and loses his money, the moral of the story is not to trust the internet this story was written by The Internet

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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