Why didn't the boy get his sister a birthday present? Because it wasn't her birthday.

what is the difference between pizza and a Jew? pizza is a common Italian meal and a Jew is a member of a monotheistic religion

Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

What has 4 eyes and can't see. Blind siamese twins!

A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

Bill: Did you hear someone said you sounded like an owl? Dave: Who?

When I'm sad I cut myself... another slice of cheesecake.

Why was the picture so dark? Because it was night time and there were no light fixtures located anywhere near where the photo was taken.

Why did the black man shoot someone? His wife recently left him and he got fired from his job.

haha, you're an orphan

why did the black child get sent to child services? because he has an abusive father and an alcoholic mother

What's the color of a retarde dogs hair? 69

What is worse than a fly in your soup? Getting hit by a train.

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She got shot.

What do you call: A black person, A white person, A mexican, A Jew, And an athiest? Whatever their names are!

Ms. Smoot's class

The priest, rabbi and Lady Gaga walk into a bar. Lady Gaga performs on stage, while the priest and rabbi listen.

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

What did the bartender say to the bugatti owner? "Don't drink and drive"

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, "I'm sorry. I thought you were my wife. You look exactly like her." "Why you drunken, worthless, insufferable son of a BITCH!" she screamed. "Funny," he muttered, "you even sound exactly like her."

Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot had a seizure.

How do you punish Helen Keller? By grounding her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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