What is worse than getting mud on your brand new t-shirt Getting stabbed.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

what did Santa Claus say to Nikki Minaj? I really admire your musical talents

thumb_up thumb_down +14

So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Siblings are like sharks, they usually stop biting you when you stab them in the eyes

thumb_up thumb_down +14

a man walks into a bar he is promtly escorted out due to the fact that he wanted to kill the bars owner. The man got life in prison with no chance of parole. This mans name was Michael Myers.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Wanna hear a funny joke? Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

how do you fall off a building? you trip.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

George Michael walks into a bathrom.....

thumb_up thumb_down +14

What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

thumb_up thumb_down +14

Do you know what the cop said to the black guy? Your free to go

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do Michael Jackson and Whitney Houston have in common? They were both great singers.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Billy comes home from playing with his friend as he walks to his front yard he comes across his mother...she is dead on the floor his friend then says "im SO sorry your mom is dead but at least you still have your dad" Billy than replies "my mom is my dad" billy then is put into a foster home and spends years trying to recover from the fact that he is the freak offspring of a hermaphrodite

thumb_up thumb_down +12

*Ring* *Ring* Bartender : Hello? Stranger:Is Mike Hunt their? Bartender: Mike Hunt! Is Mike Hunt here?! Mike Hunt: Oh thank god! I've been anticipating this phone call for a while now! I've been stranded here for hours and my wife's been killed and the killer is still out there!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the boy do when he was bored and broke? He took to the streets selling illicit drugs such as cocaine. Although dangerous, the rush from said danger solved his boredom problem. On top of this, there is a huge market for such substances and he was not broke for much longer.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Q: how do you get a girl with one arm to fall out a tree? Wave and wait for her to wave back.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the person say to the person about to run into the tree? Watch out for that tree!

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

what did the jaguar and the girl have in common? Spots, the girl had the chicken pox

thumb_up thumb_down +12

What did the orange elephant with 6 legs say? Kill me.

thumb_up thumb_down +12

Women are definitely a full time job.. You should be paid to have them......

thumb_up thumb_down +10

...NO.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Yo mamas so fat.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Knock knock Who's there Interrupting camel (Interrupt with nothing) Camels can't talk.

thumb_up thumb_down +10

why are gays soo happy , becuase the dont have to listen to women

thumb_up thumb_down +10

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops