Kerry Katona becomes independent.

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What do you get when you mix a dog with speeding bus? Nothing, you can't mix those two things.

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What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, I wanted to be cool, But I look like you

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Knock Knock. Who's There? Its Matt.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? An astronaut

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-When is a door not a door? -Never

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What ruined the little boy's day? He drowned.

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a

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Why does a snake have eyes? To see!

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Ha

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Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

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how do u fit 20 jews in a car? 2 in the front and 20 in the ashtray

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What's 9+10=? 19

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Girl-Does this dress make me look fat? Boy-Hell yea you do, wait, let me speak your language...... Cows go MOOOOO -Ryan V

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A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock (pause) A: Knock knock B: (frustrated), I thought we had that damn thing fixed!!!

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How do you get an elephant in pajamas? Elephants are large mammals with several layers of body fat, and pajamas are for humans. there is no purpose in attempting this feat at all.

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Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

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What's the funniest part about this site? You're alone and reading this joke instead of getting a date.

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What does Santa get for Christmas? Chikungunya Fever.

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What happend when 1 second past after 7:00 am? It was still 7:00 am.

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Take my wife- to the store.

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Why did John forget his homework? While driving herself home at 8:00 PM the previous evening, his mother got into a terrible automobile accident. She was rushed to the emergency room, only to find out that one of her main arteries in her right arm was cut. Death was probable for her in the next few hours. John and his father, sitting at home playing a friendly game of chess, were notified of the accident by hospital secretaries. His father rushed John with him to the hospital in his Toyota Camry. Upon arrival, they were notified that John's mother had only a few moments left to live. They ran into her room, and said their last parting words. John's were "I love you, Mom.", and her husband's were "I love you, honey." She then passed away. John began to weep, and his father put his arm around him to try to comfort him, while feeling extreme sadness as well. Around this time, back at home, his dog, Rex, ate his homework that he left on the dining room table. John and his dad then drove back home, crying their eyes out. This kind of sadness they have never experienced before. He will always remember his mom, and love her to bits. His dad, well, he was never really the same after her death. The funeral was scheduled for the next week. John will always remember his mom as being a nice, caring individual with so much love for everyone in the world. Him and his dad later picked out a nice, blue coffin that reads "You will always be missed" on the top of it. They chose it because John's mom's favorite color was blue.

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Why didn't Jane buy an ice-cream? Because she was lactose intolerant.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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