Two rocks are in the playground. Nothing happens, because rocks are not sentient beings and are thus incapable of producing any sort of activity on their own.

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Whats black and white and red all over? A penguin in a blender

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Why did the seal get confused when a spider tried to high five him? Because spiders have eight legs.

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Two kids walked into a bar. One jumped over it

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What's the difference between Google Chrome and Bing? Not much. They are both very reliable and informative internet browsers.

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twilight

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

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What's invisible and smells like carrots? Rabbit farts. What's invisible and smells like rabbit farts? Carrots, if you're blind.

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your joke is so unoriginal. i had heard the joke before.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I'm about to kill you Don't scream, here's a lollipop

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A disabled man runs into a bar. He notices he's not disabled and realizes his mother lied to him his whole life.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, This poem's cool. I ran over your dog.

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why did the dog go inside the church? cuz the door was open.

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what do a jew homosexual and a latino all have in common? human dignity.

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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What does a black man, an Asian Man, and a Jewish Man have in common? They are all men.

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What did the man do when he saw there was water spilled on his desk? He waited two hours for it to evaporate because he was too lazy to wipe it up.

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What did the liberian man say to the kid he just spat on? You have ebola. and probably aids.

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A shark walks into a bar and the bartender says why the long face. The shark replies i dont have cancer just a terrible drinking problem.

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Betty Whites ALIVE?

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A woman goes into a butchers with her baby. She says "I live a few doors down and my scales are broken, do you mind weighing my son?" The butcher takes the boy away and a short while later returns holding a dripping bag. "He's 17lbs two ounces" he informs her, as his colleague brings the boy to the counter safe and well.

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What's the difference between a jew and a boyscout? A boyscout comes back from camp.

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What do dogs and cats have in common? They eat dog food, accept for the cat.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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