Your mamma is so fat that she went on a diet.

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why did the farmer cry after a phone call? he just found out his wife just died of lung cancer

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? She is blind and is therefore ineligible for a driver's license.

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whats small and has four hoofs? A sow

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what do you call a animal with 3 horns. a triceratops

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what did eminem say to dr.dre? nothing u idoits dr.dres dead he is locked in my basement

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A man walked into a bar. He ended up in the hospital being treated for a concussion.

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why did the chicken cross the road? orange you glad I didn't say banana

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Roses are red Violets are blue Pump up the pasta You need bigger boobs

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Why did the girl jump? Because she was on a trampoline.

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What has wings, is bald, and can't fly? A bald eagle. I lied about the part where it can't fly.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, My van is coming, I'm gonna get you!

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Haikus are useful Actually they are not.... ....I am so sorry

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KNOCK! KNOCK! who knocks like that? all my friends break the door down...oh alright then ill answer i guess WHO IS IT? THE REAPER oh s*** dude! [panic face] NO ONES HOME? "In other news tonight, 2 local men found murdered in their living rooms, after looking up common joke style called antee joke. Police say the door was smashed in an obvious sign of forced entry. They seem to have just mysteriously had sudden heart attacks and fainted. heh heh...hey nancy....why did the chicken cross the road? [=< heh heh" "y" "because he thouroughly enjoyed darting out into traffic" "HAHAHAHAHAHAHA *GASP!* X.x dead face "NANCY! NANCY!.....well in other OTHER news ive just murdered nancy, and thats no joke." *runs*

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What did the dog say to his owner? Nothing, dogs do not have mouths that are shaped for forming words. Talking would require too many complex movements of the mouth, and since a dog's brain is very small, it would not have the capacity to hold that much information.

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The awkward moment when a joke doesn't end the way you think it dinosaur.

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If I could change one thing about the alphabet, knd stte bporw xzuor flllle !

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How do you confuse a black man? Paint him white.

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Roses are red Violets are blue im a retard dictionary

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I had a grammar lesson yesterday. I learned how to speak more good.

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What's a green tasty vegetable? None, they're vegetables.

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What do you call a helicopter above Hawaii? A helicopter.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead. Why did the sloth fall out of the tree? Because it was holding hands with the monkey. Why were the monkey and the sloth holding hands? Because they were best friends.

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why is black such a deprssing color because it symbolizes death

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops