How are a grape and a duck alike? They're both purple... except for the duck.

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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what did the lion say to the zebra? roar!

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What do you get if you cross a sheep and a kangeroo??? ... A sheep cannot be crossed with a kangaroo because the genes from sheep cannot work with genes from a kangaroo to produce hybrid sheegaroos or kangareeps.

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How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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A blonde walked into a phone pole.

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Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

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how do you kill a zombie? Zombies arent real.

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A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

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Children playing GTA......... what a world of rapists

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How do you upset a builder? Kill all his family.

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Whats worst than getting screwed. Your mother

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Why did LeBron James up and bail on Cleveland? He thought there was a greater opportunity for postseason success by playing in Miami.

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What did the Vietnam veteran see on Christmas that changed his life? Nothing, he was blind. He continued to live his life in the same way, begging for drug money and getting bullied by all the other homeless vets.

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A man finds an old lamp, rubs it, and releases the genie trapped inside. The genie grants him three wishes. So the man wishes for a million more wishes and uses them all wisely,

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What is long and hard on a black man? First grade.

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Don't you spell Pewdiepies name like "Pewdipie" than Pew-die-pie? Like who wants to kill a pie?

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A: Knock! Knock! B: Who's there? A: Kitchen B: Kitchen who? A: GET THERE!

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What's the difference between a watermelon and a baby? One of them I can whack with a hammer, the other is a watermelon.

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Q: Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? A: Getting raped

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whats is big, black, and has big boobs. a big black guy. the boob part was a little white lie

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what did Barak Obama order at Dunking Donuts. a donut

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You's so ugly you should consider facial reconstruction surgery if it's covered by your insurance.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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