A baby seal walks into a club...

What does a dog do in his spare time? Lick himself.

how do you kill a jew? inject him/her with gratuitous amounts of cyanide until they cease to have brain function and a pulse.

Three black guys walked into a bar. They all behaved very nicely, payed their bills and left when they where done.

Billy is walking down the street when he spots 1 armed johnny hanging in a tree.Billy proceeds to wave causing Johnny to wave with his 1 arm. Johnny falls out of the tree and dies

"knock knock" "ill get it honey" "no stay in the kitchen bitch!"

I'll give you a nickel to lick my pickle, a dime to take your time and a quarter if I can f*ck you in the ass

Why do you believe in evolution? Because it increases the power of my pokemon.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? A dead baby in a clown costum

whats sad about three black men driving off a cliff in a cadillac? a cadillac seats five.

Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

Fire extinguishers are sexy.

Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

Why was the black man excited when he found a $20 bill on the ground? -Anyone would be excited

Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

What's worse than standing in line at Walmart? Being raped. What's worse than paying an outrageous amount for whatever it is you bought at Walmart? Being pregnant with a rape baby.

What is laying in the corner of the living room of an abandoned house and keeps getting smaller over the years? A decaying baby left there by a crack-head.

Wanna hear an oxymoron? Jews for Jesus.

Your momma is so dumb, that when she took the IQ test her scores were considerably lower then average.

What did the Black guy say to the White Rapper? I really like your music.

Waiter, waiter! There's a fly in my soup! Apologies for the inconvenience sir, I shall bring you a new bowl as soon as possible.

If a tree falls in the forest does a woman hear it? Probably, but the real question is why is there a tree in the kitchen?

blind man walks into a . . . .. .

connor sucks

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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