Student; Miss, please may I go toilet? Teacher; Yes, but say your alphabet first. Student; Ok

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Why did the boy have cable? I don't know.

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wheres a place a cancer patient cant go? the hairdressers

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Have you seen the movie "Constipation?" No. It hasn't come out yet! Of course there is no such movie in production and no plans for such a movie exist.

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What did the homeless man get for Christmas? Nothing, he's Jewish.

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Want to see a funny movie? -Watch Schindler's List

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To warn people on the other side that the sky was falling

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Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? Neither has he, he's blind.

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Anti-Jokes is addicting, you know what else is addicting? Heroine.

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So a woman is in the kitchen. And she makes the most delicious turkey salad for her 4 hungry children and her husband. They love Jesus

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So a man walks into a bar, he meets a few friends, has a few beers, and at the end of the night he calls a cab to drive him home

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What did the one lawyer say to the other lawyer? We are both lawyers!!

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That moment when you touch your balls then sniff your fingers and realize it smells good.

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women's rights

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A blonde walks into a library. She is a commerce major.

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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Meow.

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What is the best part about football The scoring

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Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Whats Mary short for? Shes got no legs

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The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

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Q: Why is the earth round? A: I am Batman.

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Y did a fat woman cross the rode? To get to McDonalds

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops