You know what is not cool? Fire.

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What's the difference between urinating on Lady Gaga and the american flag? It would be wrong to urinate on the American flag.

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Yo mama is... a very nice person, and her cooking is exquisite.

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Boy: whats for dinner Kidnapper: beans and weiners

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How do you jump off a bridge? You jump

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What do you get when you cross an elephant with a poodle? A satisfied elephant and a dead poodle.

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Whats worse than swinging a dead baby by a rope? Stopping it with a shovel.

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What's a cow's favorite vacation spot? the slaughterhouse.

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Why's the sun red? It's not it's orange.........retard

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Why did the Asian woman crash her car? She couldn't see through the slits she called eyes.

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Jameson: hey peter peter parker: what Jameson: do you know what my favorite kind of beans are Peter: no Jameson: van de camps

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kyle dosnt eat dick...

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How did the chicken cross the road? Chickens live in farms, they don't cross roads.

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Whats the worse than dieing of cancer, dieing alone and having AIDS

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I like my women like I like my coffee, I don't like coffee.

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Why couldnt i think of an anti-joke? cuz i was too high and a fly distracted me

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why couldn't the old man play basketball? he lacked the physical dexterity, had asthma, and had no arms.

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guy walks into a bar a metal bar ouch

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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Why do innocent boys have wet dreams? Cause Jesus sucks.

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knock knock. whos there?(haha ive never made my own joke before) Nick Nick who? Nick Saghir Oh, come in. Would you like some cookies?

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A black guy, an asian guy, and a white guy jump off a cliff, who lands first? Well, newton's first law states that every massive particle in the universe attracts every other massive particle with a force that is directly proportional to the product of their masses and inversely proportional to the square of the distance between them. So it depends on who weighs the most.

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if she is old enough to bleed, she probably wears tampons.

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Whats a dwarf running A running dwarf

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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