Why couldn't the little pirate see the movie? His dad had just died in a freak accident on the boat. He was going to the funeral that day. Life as a pirate isn't at all as it seems. Little Jimmy the pirate, had nothing. He had no family. His mother dead already, his sister and brother refusing to speak to him because he ran off to be a pirate with his father. Clearly, he had no idea what he was getting into, because his father was gone. What was he to do now? He had no one to go to. The ship mates were all either completly insane or never sober. That very night, Jimmy took the pistol off the ship captian and shot himself point blank in the head. Little Jimmy is in a better place now. With his mother and father. In a place where he cant be harmed any more. I miss you Jim <3. ~ Jack Sullivan

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Eine blonde Frau mit ihrem Sohn in Walmart, da sie die Lebensmittel-und Getränkebereich zu nähern, sehen sie ein mexikanischer Mann Blick in die Eier. Der Mann bittet um Hilfe aus der blonden Frau über die Qualität von Eiern. Sie sagt, ABD Eggs sind die besten, so dass die mexikanischen Kerl entscheidet, dass. Beim Verlassen des kleinen Jungen zeigt auf den Mexikaner Jungs Hut und ruft: "Aliens!" die Mutter bekommt wirklich peinlich und ruft ihren Sohn für sein Verhalten und sagt, es ist nicht richtig. Die Mutter wird erleichtert, dass sie sagen, dass die mexikanischen Kerl konnte nicht hören, da er Musik hören. Auf dem Weg aus der Mutter entdeckt einen violetten Flüssigkeit tropft aus der mexikanischen Jungs Haar. Sie fragt ihn, und er antwortet "Sein das Haargel". Die Blondine und Sohn nickt und setzt auf ihr Leben

thumb_up thumb_down +27

if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

A bartender walks into a bar. It's his shift.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

why does'nt mexico have an olympic team? because they have a poor economy and have other things to worry about.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

what red black and white al over? a t.v I was kidding about the red part

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Do you want to hear the best joke ever? Me too!

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Women's rights.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

i love huge wieners.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why didn't the black man feed his family? They'd eaten about an hour ago.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Being a demigod and slaying monsters isn't normal, but on myth it is. MYTH: Not even once.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Your mom is so fat that she saw a school bus full of white children and , thought "I can hardly even remember a time when my body used to be slim." She now keeps track of her diet and exercises regularly,the result of this has been a weight loss of over 95 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Chuck Norris can bench 210 pounds.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Do you want to hear a joke? To bad! :)

thumb_up thumb_down +23

I walked down the street. I picked up a quarter. It was shiny. Then I walked to school. I finished school, so I walked home, did my homework, and went to bed. Lesson learned: quadratic formula

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why was the girl stupid? She didn't pay attention in school because everyone was making fun of her blonde hair.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Diseases show if a prerson lacks vitamins and minerals.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why didn't the pharmacist set up his business in the jungle? Because setting up a pharmacy in the jungle is not a viable business option.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Jennifer Kim is the nicest person I have ever met, everyone loves her.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Why did the man have blood on his finger? Because he popped a pimple

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

thumb_up thumb_down +21

What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

thumb_up thumb_down +21

"knock knock" "who's there?" "its your girlfriend, lets have sex"

thumb_up thumb_down +21

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops