Why do the cangaroos are weird? cause they have testicles in front and penis back, is real!

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How did the kid drop his ice he got hit by a train Griffin Cholette

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whats made of wood and floats? everything made of wood floats

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How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

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Where is my tractor?

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What do you call something that isn't funny? Serious

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Onions stink. And so do you.

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A man walks into a bar and orders a beer. But it wasn't as good as he had hoped it would be.

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What do you call a black man driving a police car? Officer

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There is a Mexican and a Black guy in a car. Who's driving? The Mexican, you racist bastard.

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What did the man get when he found a genie in a lamp? The rest of his life in an asylum for schizophrenia.

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Q:What is a black guy running with an iPod in his hand? A: A person who enjoys to listen to music while running.

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Ken: Your dog is sick, he needs to see a vet. Megan: Omg, what is it? Ken: It's a medical person who treats animals.

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What would Michael Jackson do if he saw a naked child alone in an alleyway? It is unknown, as he cannot be asked about this hypothetical scenario due to his passing in 2009.

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How many times have I told you not to do that? Fourteen.

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Women.

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What's green and has wheels? Grass. I lied about the wheels

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Two hunters are out in the woods when one of them collapses. He doesn't seem to be breathing and his eyes are glazed. The other guy whips out his phone and calls the emergency services. He gasps, "My friend is dead! What can I do?". The operator says "Calm down. I can help. First, let's make sure he's dead." There is a silence, then the man said "he has a pulse". The operator then calmly stated "we are sending a helicopter to air lift him out of there as we speak". The man got helicoptered to the nearest ER, and the doctors did their best to save him. He ended up having to go on life support for three years until his family members finally decided to pull the plug. The medical insurance didn't cover life support and the family went broke because of it.

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You know what isn't funny? AIDS. You know what is? Brittany Spears with AIDS...

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's a woman.

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do you like fishsticks? yes they are quite delicious

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Whats small, rough, and painful to put in your ass? Sandpaper

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What do you call a black priest? Religious.

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What do you say when you take a nasty shit in you friends bathroom? There's some nasty shit in there.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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