I did your mom..... A favor..... By making you..... A sandwich...... With mustard.....

What's the difference between 10 dead babies and a red sports car? A red sports car was never a living organism.

why did the truck crash into a tree? cause staplers dont know how to drive

whats 2+2? 4

what do yo call two dog? dogs.

Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? -death -kidney failure -gall stones -getting in an automobile accident -getting struck by lightning -getting sodomized -embezzlement -deception -HIV/AIDS -illness of any nature -world hunger -the holocaust -Zimbabwe's economy -getting hit by a train -getting hit by a bus -the hives -getting bit by an alligator -head injuries -being arrested -childhood obesity -sexual predators -highly impoverished areas -losing a finger -getting hit with a bat -corruption -general rudeness -being lost in the woods -contracting a sexually transmitted virus -teen pregnancy -murder -rape -robbery -going blind -losing a child -falling down a well -bestiality -identity fraud -massacres -racism -genocide -mental disabilities in children -bullying -food poisoning -stepping on a nail -eugenics -the mass murder, rape, and theft of the land from the Native people of America -forced assimilation -slavery -brain deteriorating illness -matricide -prostitution - accidentally repeating yourself -prostitution -domestic violence -animal cruelty -pollution -deforestation -global warming -losing your life savings -still birth -oppressive leaders -physical conflicts -world wars and other military conflict -the situation in Rwanda -Inequality in treatment of women in middle eastern countries -auto theft -tax evasion -terrorism -being diagnosed with cancer -clinical depression -prostitution -finding two worms in your apple

Betty Whites ALIVE?

Why do women hate getting shot? They die.

Q: Whats better than getting raped by a dog? A: Getting raped by a cat.

No. Yes.

How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? None, now stop hallutinating about wood chuck.

What do a ginger kid get for christmas ? it dusen't matter... gingers don't have souls.

Why did Thomas miss school? Because he was sick

Roses are red Roses are pink Roses are yellow Roses are white Stop stereotyping roses, already.

( o Y o )

why did the man crash a plane into the twin towers? he was a clumsy terrorist going for the sears tower

What do you call a pregnant 8-year old? A poor reflection on our society

What did the baby get for its 1st birthday? Nothing it was aborted.

What did the goat say to the other goat? They are poorly evolved animals and incable of speaking.

Roses are red Violets are red Tulips are red Bushes are red Trees are red HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN's ON FIRE!!!!!

Potato

imagine a world without santa ill make it easy, lookout the window

What was the pirates grade? Arrr That isn't a valid grade

Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...