Why didn't Timothy wish his dad a Happy Father's Day? His dad died yesterday in a car accident.

What has wings and flies at night? A black man with wings

Knock Knock? Who's there? Look in the peephole

Roses are red, Violets are blue, WTF is this, i gotta take a piss.

Oh no! I forgot the milk!

What do you do when you see a plumbers crack. Tell him he has another crack to fill

Knock Knock! Who's there? I don't remember the rest of the joke but your mom's a whore.

Dancing Potatoe!

why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

Why did Sally drink water? Because she wanted to take pills and kill herself.

Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

Roses are red Violets are blue Billy is dead and Atom bombs blow up chines $

What is the difference between Charlie Sheen and Michael Jackson? One is dead, one is not.

The bird is not the word.... Its two

A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

why can't Hellen Keller hear? she is deaf.

Q: What do you call a man with no arms and no legs being pulled behind a boat? A: Skip.

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the gay man's house. Knock knock... Who's there? The Chicken

what did the lawyer say to the doctor? hello.

How do you stop your baby from crawling into your room? Shove a spear through its head.

A black person and a hispanic person are in a car, who is driving? The black person, after all it's his car.

Q: What's the worst part about being a black Jew? A: You have to sit at the back of the oven.

How many babies does it take to paint a wall? Depends on how hard you throw them

What is the difference between a dog being hit by a car and an Arab being hit by a car? There are skidmarks before the dog

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...