How do you stop a clown from laughing? Hit him in the face with an ax.

Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

knock knock whos there guy with a gun guy with a gun who guy with a gun who just shot you dammit

If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

(Two person joke for an audience Joke Teller. "What's the difference between a rabbit and a cowsay?" Accomplice "a what?" Joke Teller. "a cowsay?" Accomplice "what's a cowsay?" Joke Teller. "Mooooooo"

I like to eat people

Why didn't the business man ever wear pants? He didn't have any legs.

connor sucks

In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

A man sees his friend and asks jokingly, "Hey is that ketchup or blood on your face?" The friend replies, "No, I ate your family," and shoots the man in the head with a rifle.

a black guy and a hispanic are in a car. Whos driveing? The bvlack guys mom, picking them up from a church class, and takeing them to volunteer a the local homeless shelter.

Two muffins are in an oven. It was a really small batch.

The 13th Amendment...

Why was the boy crying. He just got raped by a llama

What was the doctor's shirt made out of? Cotton

Q- Whats The Difference Between a Jew and a TV Dinner? A- One Gets Cooked in the Oven and the other is a TV Dinner!

Reed is poopin

Doctor! Doctor! Can I have a second opinion? The Doctor then sits the patient down and tells them from a different perspective that they have terminal Cancer and will be dead by the end of the year.

Unless you yourself put you trough that pain and misery, you have no reason to dislike or flee from who you are.

Why did the chicken cross the border? Because he was an immigrant and was afraid of the police.

The bird is not the word.... Its two

What's pink, wrinkly and hangs out your trousers? Your nan.

What would you rather do or drag a board?

What do you get when you mix a mexican and a frenchman? A person of mixed racial heritage.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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