A guy went to a haunted house on Friday the thirteenth… it gave him a small fright and he continued on with his day

thumb_up thumb_down -35

Immediately following his inauguration, Bush called Obama into the oval office for a private meeting and some words of advice. Bush and Obama shook hands as gentlemen do and then Bush asked if Obama wanted to hear a joke. Obama eagerly said yes, "Good..." Bush said, handing Obama a battered copy of the United States Constitution, "...the joke is in your hands", and with that Bush turned and left.

thumb_up thumb_down -39

IF UR READING THIS EXPECTING A GOOD JOKE HERE GOES.... WHY DID THE CUP SAY HELLO GET IT ? I DONT

thumb_up thumb_down -39

Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

thumb_up thumb_down -55

Why was 6 scared of 7? Because 7 raped and murdered 8.

thumb_up thumb_down +62

Q: Where does a hooker go for her footlong? A: Subway

thumb_up thumb_down +60

Knock Knock Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The Police then give the S.W.A.T team the signal, and bust down the door and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door is Carlos Pedrojeuz, a serial killer, meth addict who has been a part of the sex slave trade for a decade. One might think of answering the door next time.

thumb_up thumb_down +54

Sorry boss

thumb_up thumb_down +52

Roses are red, Violets are blue, What are you doing, I'm ithyphallophobic.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Your momma's so fat: She's willing to risk kidney damage and embarrassing flatulence by undertaking the atkins diet.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Why was the little boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

thumb_up thumb_down +50

Yo mama's so fat, she has low self-esteem.

thumb_up thumb_down +46

Why did the Mexican guy run to the hospital? Because it was faster than walking.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Why does no one we talk about Nagasaki, they got bombed too...

thumb_up thumb_down +42

What's worse than ten babies nailed to one tree? One baby nailed to ten trees.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

A Holocaust joke? I did Nazi that coming...Anne, Frankly, I'm quite offended.

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Watch this summer, as General Jack Ryu, attempts to fight his way across the jungle only known as "The streets" as he seeks to save Mary.Bison from the evil clutches of Master Jamie Ken in this epic written trailer! Jack Ryu: So we are brothers? Jamie Ken: No, I am your failed clone! I spontaneously begin burning from me feet and hands! WHHHHHHYYYY WAS I NOT THE CHOOOOOSEN ONE!!!!!! Mary B: Ryu... He is the fifth! THE FIFTH HAS ARRIVED! Jim "Dan" Daniels: Yes certainly, it is well within my scientific genius to create the fifth, yet my former associate Bob Sagat lost an eye in an explosion... CAN JACK RYU SAVE THE WORLD FROM THE MOST DEVASTATING BOMB IN THE UNIVERSE: THE AKUMA BEFORE JAMIE KEN UNLEASHES IT? CAN JACK RYU... FIGHT TROUGH THE STREETS... AND LIVE UP TO THE FIFTH AND SAVE MARY BISON? ALL DEPENDS IF HE CAN CONTROL HIS INNER CHUN LI! STREET FIGHTER V: rEVOLUTION

thumb_up thumb_down +42

Two women were sitting quietly.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

what do you call a little girl next to a mexican? a rape victim.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

What did the cripple kid get for Christmas? Cancer. You know what he got the next the next Christmas? Nothing he died.

thumb_up thumb_down +40

When you're climbing up a ladder and you feel something splatter, you may want to see what happened, and then promptly clean up the mess so one one slips.

thumb_up thumb_down +38

knock knock go away ok

thumb_up thumb_down +38

What did the rabbit say to the rabbi? ...RABBITS DO NOT TALK! So then the rabbi said, "In that case you must be a hare!"

thumb_up thumb_down +38

Whats worse than the holocaust? Being a jew in the Holocaust.

thumb_up thumb_down +36

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops