Why God isn't a woman? Because Moses wouldn't last it 40 days on the mountain if that was true. And he also wouldn't come back with only 10 rules.

A blond, a brunette, and a red-head are standing on the edge of a cliff. They then realize how dangerous that is and proceed to back away and view the canyon at a safe distance.

Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, HOLY SHIT MY GARDEN'S ON FIRE

knock knock. who's there? ya ya who? dot com

Why did the man go to the barber? To get a haircut

A black man walks into a bar. The man behind him ducks.

Where did the little girl go after the explosion? Everywhere.

YOU SUCK RYAN V!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! U SUCK BALLS!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have you heard the tale of the black knight on the black horse? Well, the black knight on the black horse rode up to the castle of the king and was stopped by a guard who calls out, “Who goes there!?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I’m here to see the King!” So the guard lets him through and the King calls out, “Who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I want to marry your daughter the princess.” So the King thinks about it and finally decides, “OK I’ll let you marry her if you can bring me the ruby from the ruby dragon.” So the black knight on the black horse travels for miles and miles over deserts and through woods and up mountains till he finds the ruby dragon and the ruby dragon calls out, “who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I want your ruby so I can marry the princess.” So the dragon thinks about it and decides to give the black knight on the black horse the ruby (it was a kind dragon). So the black knight on the black horse rides back to the castle and is once again stopped by a guard who calls out, “Who goes there!?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I’m here to see the King!” So the guard lets him through and the King calls out, “Who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse, I’ve brought you the ruby from the ruby dragon and I want to marry your daughter the princess.” So the King thinks about it and finally decides, “OK I’ll let you marry her if you can bring me the emerald from the emerald dragon.” So the black knight on the black horse travels for miles and miles over deserts and through woods and up mountains till he finds the emerald dragon and the emerald dragon calls out, “who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I want your emerald so I can marry the princess.” So the dragon thinks about it and decides to give the black knight on the black horse the emerald (it was a kind dragon). So the black knight on the black horse rides back to the castle and is once again stopped by a guard who calls out, “Who goes there!?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I’m here to see the King!” So the guard lets him through and the King calls out, “Who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse, I’ve brought you the ruby from the ruby dragon and the emerald from the emerald dragon and I want to marry your daughter the princess.” So the King thinks about it and finally decides, “OK I’ll let you marry her if you can bring me the diamond from the diamond dragon.” So the black knight on the black horse travels for miles and miles over deserts and through woods and up mountains till he finds the diamond dragon and the diamond dragon calls out, “who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I want your diamond so I can marry the princess.” So the dragon thinks about it and says no. So they fight for three days till the black knight on the black horse slays the diamond dragon and rides back to the castle with the diamond. He is once again stopped by a guard who calls out, “Who goes there!?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse and I’m here to see the King!” So the guard lets him through and the King calls out, “Who goes there?” and the black knight on the black horse replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse, I’ve brought you the ruby from the ruby dragon and the emerald from the emerald dragon and the diamond from the diamond dragon and I want to marry your daughter the princess.” So the King thinks about it and finally decides, “OK I’ll let you marry her, go upstairs and ask her.” So the black knight on the black horse goes upstairs and knocks on the princess’s door and she calls out, “Who goes there?” He replies, “I am the black knight on the black horse, will you marry me?” and she said, “No.”

Chuck norris eats nails for breakfast. This is most likely the cause of his bleeding stomach and acid reflux.

why did the boy fall of the bridge? He got shot in the head.

A man walks into a bar. He orders a few drinks, and goes home an hour or so later.

A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are walking down the street when they find a genie. They run away in fear because finding a genie out of nowhere is kinda freaky.

as i unscrewed my belly button and suddenly my butt fell off

A man forgets to hang his food in a tree on a camping trip. A bear comes and kills his wife and two kids but leaves the man to live with the guilt for the rest of his life.

why did the chicken cross the road? because it had earlier escaped from its cage and had since began to wonder around the local town

What did Tarzan say when the monkeys came over the hill? Hey look, the monkeys are coming over the hill.

a black guy walks into a fast food place.

whats worst than the holocaust? the holocaust times 2

What is black and white and red all over the news paper of someone with tuberculosis

Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

What do you call a black pilot? A pilot.

Why wasn't the boy at his basketball game? - Because he, his twin brother, and pregnant mother all died in a fatal car accident involving a train on the way their.

This is Jeff and I gots to take a HUGE SHIT. I bet its gonna be smelly and runny. After I wipe I'm gonna lick it and taste it. I bet it tastes GOOD. I hope it has a lil blood in it too.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

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The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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