Knock knock. Who's there? It's the police. Your father's been taken to county jail for his third DUI.

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whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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Why was the woman's purse so heavy? Because it had a lot of stuff in it.

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I ate high protein foods and now my flatulence smells wrank.

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Your mom is so fat because she ate her emotions when your dad walked out, not to mention her history of bulimia as a teenager.

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A Black man and an Asian man are at a bar. They have a few drinks and then leave.

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A Priest, a Rabbi, and a Methodist minister were playing golf. The Priest won by one stroke.

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Fire extinguishers are sexy.

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What's black and hangs from my tree? A black man. I am a racist.

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Josh Hamilton walks into a bar.

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Q: whats worse than getting aids? A: Giving your mom aids.

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omg this doesn't work 1.hold breath for 5 minutes 2.die it doesn't work cause you would just knock yourself unconconsiuse and your body will start breathing for you again until you wake up

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Q: why did the guys neck hurt after the car crash A: he had a sun burn

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Nero, I understand, what I thought was correct, was to teach people to understand those exact words that you are conveying. Its not that, I am afraid of showing the world the man that I am. But rather that I am not a man, I admire your vision, and tried to follow it, as we got much in, common, I can think as an individual and still admire your work. But you know how society is built, if too many find out I am a woman, then that not only reveals that I have been lying to them, which I have, but also that well, women are not exactly seen as equals, I know I never was, all people ever saw in me was "a great pair of tits".

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It had the utmost desire to.

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There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

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Q.Why did the chicken cross the road? A.forty-two

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Why did Helen Keller cross the road? To end her misery.

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Yo mamma's handwriting is so bad that its barely legible to most people!

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how big is a midgets dick? i dont know but probably bigger then mine

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How does a blonde restart her computer? Seriously, you guys, I need help. I'm not a very technological person.

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Are you a human?

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What's brown and sticky? Poop.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops