Why did the chicken cross the road? Because i was keeping his family at gun-point on the other side.

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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Why did Sara fall off the swings? She had no arms. Knock Knock. Who's there? Not Sara.

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why does'nt mexico have an olympic team? because they have a poor economy and have other things to worry about.

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Q:What happened to the fat man that rode a roller coaster? A:He had fun

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Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

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Two Haitians walk into a bar and it collapses

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A: Knock Knock! B: No ones home.

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There once was a rose that was red Violets are blue Knock Know who's there? Man I gotta quit huffing glue

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What has 4 eyes but can't see? A blind man wearing glasses.

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What happened to the guy who ate an alarm clock at six o' clock in the morning? He puked a lot, and was diagnosed with a horrible digestive disorder.

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Two scientists walk into a bar. The first scientist says, "I'll have some H2O." The second scientist says, "I'll have H2O too." The bartender gives them both water, realizing that H2O2 is poisonous and that the second scientist must have simple worded his request poorly.

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i joined the nazis... but 2 days later i found out i am a jew

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How many cows does it take to swim on land? 4.2

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whats the difference between a joke and the holocaust? ...There both funny..Exept for the Holocaust.

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Where did Ellen go after the explosion? Everywhere

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A horse walks into a bar, Bartender says why the long face? and the horse says, i have horse aids

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Roses are red. Violets are purple. Haha. Purple.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall?

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What happened to boy who fell down the stairs? He died. What happened to the girl who fell down the same stairs? The boy who fell down the stairs hit her down the stairs too and they both died What happened to the man fell down these very same stairs? He got peer pressure and committed suicide.

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Two men walk into a bar. You would have thought the second one would have ducked.

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Q. Why did the rooster switch on the TV? A. Just for some hentertainment!

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i hate it when Voldemort showers in my nutella

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Your mother is so fat that I'm starting to worry about her health.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops