What time is it when grandpa sits ontop of a telephone pole and throws pineapples at people? Time to go to a nursing home

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Woman's rights.

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Q: Why did sally fall off the swing? A: She got hit in the face with an axe

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Q: Why did the singer stop singing? A: Someone threw a car at her face.

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What do you call an alligator in a vest? An amphibious mammal wearing clothes. Why would you ask me that.

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Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

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How do you kill 23 kids? You put 24 kids in an arena.

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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A horse walks into a bar and the bartender says .... Hey, you shouldn't be in here; you're a big and powerful animal and any sudden movement could be dangerous for anyone around you. You have sharp hooves and we don't carry anything ergonomically designed for you to actually drink out of ... so, it's probably best that you just go ahead and get out of here. The irishman at the bar says to the bartender: Why are you talking to a horse as if it can understand you? They do not understand the spoken word and do not have the vocal chords to reply.

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A student goes up to the teacher because he has to go to the washroom. The teacher tells him that he has to sing the ABC's before he can go. So the boy sings, "ABCDEFGHIJKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ." The teacher said he did a perfect job and could go to the washroom. The boy went on to become a billionaire. Congrats!

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Whats red and eats like dog? A fox.

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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Why did the chicken cross the road? How did the chicken get out of the henhouse?

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Chuck Norris doesn't sleep. He has been diagnosed with chronic insomnia.

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What do you call a person who is 6 feet under? Lost.

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What do you call a guy who makes jokes about a girl being in the kitchen? Single.

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A man walks into a bar. He sits down and orders a drink from the bartender. The bartender gets it for him and says "Here you go." The man then says "Thank you." The man then starts to drink his drink, and appreciates the fine quality of the drink. Afterwards, he finishes the drink, and decides to leave the bar and go home.

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The World Record For Longest Game of Hide and Seek goes to... Binladin

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You just won the game...

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Why couldn't sally drive her car? Because sally is a girl.

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I have a good knock knock joke: You start it.

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What do you do when a blond ask you a question? Answer politely and thank her for her wonderful question.

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Money is no object. Because I don't have any.

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Your momma is so dumb, that when she took the IQ test her scores were considerably lower then average.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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