How many blind people does it take to screw in a light bulb? Does it matter?

I like my coffee like my women. Without a penis.

Person1: Why did the chicken cross the road? Person2: I dunno.-. to get to the other side? Person1: :( I dream of a better tomorrow where a chicken can cross the street without having his motives questioned

Why was the black man pulled over? He was going 10 miles over the speed limit.

There were two muffins in an oven one muffin said, "Is it hot in here or is it just me?" the other muffin said, "AHHH A TALKING MUFFIN!"

Knock Knock. Who's there? Nancy Nancy who? Nancy.

A russian gives away vodka.

A Higgs Boson walks into a church. The priest says “We don’t allow Higgs Bosons in here.” The Higgs Boson replied, “Well, without me, you can’t have mass.”

Why did hitler need glasses? Because he could Nazi.

Miranda Lorenz is a WHORE!!! She has slept with three guys while in a relationship!! then when he broke up with her for cheating on him, she keyed his car!! Psycho Bitch!!!

AHAHAHAHAHA XD I cant for the life of me imagine Donald Duck accusing anyone of being a seducer XD, my eyes are tearing up XD If I do not type anything more, its because I died of laughter and joy XD But those "cartoons" where made for adults, ever seen steamboat Willie? That is one of my favorites, I always liked Mickey Mouse a bit better, Donald kinda changed a lot.

if two couples walk down the street, when do they die? when a pack of rabid dogs eats them.

How do you kill a black guy With a gun

Why cant little billy jump? He was aborted.

A disabled man runs into a bar. He notices he's not disabled and realizes his mother lied to him his whole life.

What is the Civil War called in Virginia? The War of Northern Aggression.

how do you wake lady gaga up? you punch-her-face

what did helen keller name her dog? scruffy

What did the black kid get for his birthday? A bike, just what he asked for.

What's the difference between babies and butter? You can't pitchfork butter.

If god gives you lemons You find a new god.

My friend is a genius! JK!......... i have no friends

Whats worse than a paper cut? AIDS.

A Jew, homosexual and Irishman walk into a bar. What a fine example of an integrated community.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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