What do you call cheese that isn't your's? Someone else's cheese.

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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What's worse than being held hostage? Waking up and finding dick your mouth

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knock knock whose there? it's me, Connie oh hi Connie, wont you come in? oh i was just wandering if i could borrow your scotch tape ofcourse! one moment please. no problem. say, hows phil been? oh he's great, he just got a new job! here's your scotch tape! thank you so much! ....................... what a perfect scene. It is very unfortunate, though, for as Connie walked away from the family whom she borrowed the tape from, a car came by and with a single strike, killed her. this proves that nothing is perfect.

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Why was the man crying He wasnt his allergies were acting up.

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How old are you? 20

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"Up to 50% off."

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So this guy drunk guy pokes this girl. 4 months later the girl has a misscarrage.

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Q: Why didnt the dinosaurs cross the road? A: Because theyre all dead.

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Your mama is so stupid she had to go back to school to get her GED in order to get a job that could properly support her family.

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how does a black woman find out if she is pregnant? she takes a pregnancy test

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What did the Asian man do when he got lost in the desert? He ate his arms.

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a pie would you like some?

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Hey Caleb.

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Osama Bin Laden dies.

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A man asked another man what he was doing the next day. The man then proceeded to tell him that he had not intended on having any plans due to the fact that he was planning on killing himself within the next twenty three hours.

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why did the girl fall off the swing? she had no arms why did no one pick her up? she was an orphan why did she drown? puddle...

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What's orange and hurts when you get it in your eye? An orange knife.

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Tom Petty walks into a bar and the bartender says, "I'm sorry, you are visibly intoxicated. We cannot sell you liquor." The bar explodes because someone said no to Tom Petty.

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What do you call poop in a black man's toilet? Poop.

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how many prostitutes does it take to fix a lightbulb? it depends how much you pay them

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what did the little girl with no arms or legs get for her birthday? a bike.

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Im Jackson Sinclair and Me and Carter Weeks-69;)

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What's orange and doesn't bounce? A flat basketball

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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