Roses are red Violets are red I murdered the gardener

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What happens when a man and a woman really love each other?... - They'll most likely go on a date and enjoy themselves.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

thumb_up thumb_down +4

A man and woman was sitting at a bar. The man bought the woman a roofied drink and she has never been seen again.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

women's rights

thumb_up thumb_down +2

why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

you wanna know hellen kellers favorite game? Marco Polo!

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mom’s so dumb she forgot to update her WordPress installation and now she has pharmaceutical links all over her page.

thumb_up thumb_down

Chuck norris walked into a bar. He went up to the bartender, clenched his fists and gave him some money

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did Kanye West hit Rihanna? He didn't. It was Chris Brown you dumb ****

thumb_up thumb_down

What's white and sticky? A sticky polar bear.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

thumb_up thumb_down

A man walks into a bar. The bartender says "why the long face?" He says, "I have acromegaly"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's worst that the Holocaust? Another one.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did your mum have sex with my mum? Because they're lesbian.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many anti-joke fans does it take to screw in a lightbulb? One. Or two if it's a really high bulb and you need a second person to hold the ladder for safety.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Q: What's the worst part about being a black Jew? A: You have to sit at the back of the oven.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

If you are good at taking quizzes, you are quizzical. What are you if you are good at taking tests? Testical.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

What's the difference between a baseball player on the Yankees, and one on the Red Sox? One was named Jeff, the other wasn't.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

- Server, there's a hair in my soup ! - You're right, sir, I'll give you another soup imminently.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Imagine: You are trapped in a prizon cell with no doors, no windows, no furniture and completely sealed in with nothing. What do you do? Stop imagining!

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Jay Leno: The economy is so bad.. Audience: how bad is it?! Jay Leno: Very bad.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops