There's two men on a subway. One says "Hey, that's my sandwich.".

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I have a crush on my dad.

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Enchilada

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Why do showers in Germany have 11 holes? Because a regular human on has 10 fingers.

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(Man #1): Do you know how I know you're gay? (Man #2): How? (Man #1) When I kiss you, you kiss me back...

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Why did LeBron James up and bail on Cleveland? He thought there was a greater opportunity for postseason success by playing in Miami.

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Did you hear about the man who didn't get a burger with his meal?! Yes he is doing quite well on his diet don't you agree?

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'Knock knock' 'who's there?' 'Whinny the poo' 'Whinny the poo who?' 'Whinny the poo'

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Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

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If you asked an alzheimer's patient what the meaning of life is, what answer would you get? Probably an answer that doesn't respond to the question but is bound to be hilarious.

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Why was the man with cancer bald? He wanted to tan his scalp.

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Why was the fish swimming on the water? Oh wait it's dead

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If pinocchio said "my nose is going to grow", what would happen?

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Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

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What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

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Doctor: your mom has cancerous aids Me:*sob*

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What's easier to get than a broke hooker on the side of the street? Osama Bin Laden.

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WOMAN! I am not a sweetheart at the core, I am slightly sweet on the outside and really really dark and cruel on the inside, so I can trick people into loving me before I consume them! Anyway, sure, I will get to it, first thing when I wake up, like 8 hours from now okay? Moral: Seriously? Are you hoping to see a sweetheart at my core?

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What did Connor say to the fat man? Dude ur extremely fat.

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What is the unltimate Jewish dilemma? Free pork

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How do you drown a blond? Hold her head under water until she finally stops thrashing around.

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Make an effort in life whenever you want. Fight trough life when you got no other choice.

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Q:Whats worse than 100 babies in 1 dumpster? A:1 dead baby is 100 dumpsters.

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Canida

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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