Q: What did one tube of glue say to the other tube of glue? A:Nothing. They're tubes of glue. Inanimate objects, such as a tube of glue, however adhesive the contents of said object is, are not capable of advanced speech, let alone basic communication.

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What do you say to a very ambitious dyslexic child? You're ambition is inspiring and I encourage you to follow your dreams. Some of the worlds greatest people, including Albert Einstein, Thomas Edison, and Winston Churchill were dyslexic. Your drive is much bigger than your disorder.

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Want to hear a tough toung twister? spoons

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What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

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no

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A woman should not be in the kitchen.

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Why'd the chicken cross the road? Why? To get to the gay guys house. Knock Knock! Who's there? The chicken.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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People tell me im insane. Its all a conspiracy.

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Adam gives a new view of roid rage

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poo poo you you doo doo too too

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"Up to 50% off."

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Grandma got ran over by a reindeer. She died.

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What's worst then the holocaust, titanit and 9-11 4 bee stings.

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Where does piglet look for Pooh? The hundred acre forest, you creep.

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A man walks into a bar. We see him as he approaches the register wearing a dark hoody. The surveillance camera seen here catches a glimpse of the man's face appearing to be a white male with mustache and beard. As you can see the man opens the register and takes the money before the bartender can get to him. If you have any information about this crime please call crime stoppers at 1-800-GET-HELP. In other news, the DOW JONES reached a record high today as investors in China begin working on keeping the economy from plundering.

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what's red and smells like water? Red food-coloured water.

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Why? Because!

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whats wrong with 4 blackmen in a jaguar falling over a cliff?? That was my car...

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A Psychologist said that I am a pessimist... Figures.

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where do you get virgin wool from? ugly sheep.

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Psychic wanted. You know where to apply.

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I used to be an adventurer like you. Then i took an arrow to the knee.

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What job function does a blonde have in an M&M factory? Quality control or some other function.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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