How many dull people does it take to replace a lightbulb? One.

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Guy 1: Are you alright? Guy 2: No, i'm half left!

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Why did the elephant cross the road? It's an elephant. Who's going to stop it?

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A pregnant women walks into a bar and orders a drink. The bartender denies her service because she is under the legal age.

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Clement: Hey love. Want to go out on a date? Patience: No. Clement: That's all right. Your agreement is not needed. *Clement ties up Patience's hands and feet, gags her and puts her in the back of his meat delivery van. He is planning to throw her into the sewers.

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What did the scientist have to say about religion when he was asked by a local reporter? He said that it is a cultural system that creates powerful and long-lasting meaning, by establishing symbols that relate humanity to truths and values.

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A man got a promotion at work. Now he makes more money.

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What do you call a group of black people? You don't You call the cops first.

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What did the leper say to the prostitute? Hello Prostitute.

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How do you kill somebody instantly? Make them smell Smelly mcD's socks.

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I saw a Chinese guy and a black guy talking to each other today, it gave me hope... For another rush hour movie

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The bird is not the word.... Its two

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What do you call a man with no legs and arms hanging on your wall? Art

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why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

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Q: What did the ugly duckling say to the other ducks? A: QUACK!

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a seal walks into a bar. replace "bar" with "club". and replace "walks into" with "gets bludgeon by."

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Oh no! I forgot the milk!

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What is funnier than an uncontrolled explosions? Most things, because explosions damage property, and cause deaths.

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How did the man rape the woman? With his penis.

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Yo mama is so fat, she is thinking of going on a diet.

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- Knock Knock - who's there? - Gestapo! open the door!

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What do you do if a blond throw a grenade at you? Take the pin out and throw it back

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?". The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English. It is confused by its surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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Hippopatomous!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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