What happens when you lay a diamond in the water for two hours? It gets wet.

What did the blind, deaf rabbit get for Easter? . . . Eaten by a by a lion.

Have you ever tried ethiopian food? No. Neither have they

Knock knock. Who's there? You're adopted.

What sits in a corner and travels all the way around the world? A stoner on hallucinogens.

What's worse than getting hit by an arrow in the knee? Being kidnapped for 10 years and finally getting free only to find out your whole family was murdered by the person who kidnapped you.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? I threw a refrigerator at it

Roses are Red Violets are Blue I have five fingers and one of then is poking at you

I still remember the last words my grandpa said to me before he kicked the bucket. He said, "Hey. how far do you think I can kick this bucket."

What is white, long, and thin? A tablecloth

Roses are brown, violets are brown, who keeps shitting in my garden?

Oh my God, my friend just got hit by a truck. Lets go get ice cream

Knock Knock, Who's there? The Police. *No Answer* The police then give the S.W.A.T the signal, bust down the door, and kill 15 high profile targets issued by Liberia. The man who did not answer the door was Carlos Pedrouez, a serial killer, meth addict who has been apart of the Arizona sex slave trade for over a decade. The world can now sleep softly. The door was also red.

How do you kill a dinosaur? You don't. It's already dead.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

Why did the chicken cross the road? He was suicidal.

Whay was 6 afraid of 7? 7 had an extra penis

What do you call a successful black man who has it all? A hip hop artist.

A plane crashes on the border of the United States and Canada. Where do they bury the survivors? Why would they bury the survivors? THEY'RE ALIVE

Why did the black guy go to jail, because he did illegal stuff.

Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

100% of smokers die 100% of people die I am tied to a tree

Women's sports

What is Helen Keller's dogs name? She had fish.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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