What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

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Whats worse than being arrested for a crime you didn't commit? Teenage pregnancy.

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Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

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Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

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"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

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Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

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Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

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Q:What did the ginger get for Christmas? A: A soul...jk,hair dye

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Why did the blonde kill herself? She was diagnosed with major depression and was dealing with a lot of traumatic events in her life.

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What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

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what have big boobs, and fat ass ? fat man

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How do you spell Mississippi with out an i? You can't because removing an i from the word Mississippi would cause it to be spelled incorrectly.

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A man was building a new kitchen for his wife. Just as he was installing the sink, his wife comes running into the kitchen and starts cursing. "What's the matter?" he asks. "Don't you like the new sink?" His wife replies, "I love it. But come quick, there's a spider in the living room!" The man walks over with a paper towel, grabs the spider, and throws it into the garbage. The wife looks at the husband, smiling, and says, "Thanks."

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A man walks into a bar. Q: What's the apple doing on your head? A: Peach? It's not pear. It's banana.

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What disease did the gay man get from his partner? Streptococcus!

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Knock knock. Who's there? John John who John

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Why can't Helen Keller Drive? Because she's dead.

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Why did Patrick buy an apple? So he can eat it

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Why did the black guy cross the road? To save the endangered child from getting hit by a car across the street.

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If all the world was like Jesus...wouldn't we all die on crosses?

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Uh, erm, uh...I don't know.

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Knock knock Who's there? 7. And if that's you in there, 6, you better start praying.

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Roses are Grey, Violets are Grey, Everything's Grey, I am a Dog.

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What is worse than a bus falling on you? A bus with Mama June inside it falling on you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops