I'm going to Re-write History... History

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Get your coat, I've got a knife.

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What eats dicks for dinner and smells like he just licked an STD infested turtle? Jimmy

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Why did the chicken cross the road? -because chickens have a free ability to walk and this chicken felt the urge to walk across the road. Why not?

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What's the difference between a jew and a pizza? A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in an oven.

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Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a registered sex offender.

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On a scale of 1 to Chris Brown, how mad would you be if i ate your golfish? Very angry, as my goldfish is not food.

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A- Knock Knock B- Who's there? A- Soccer!

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A blonde read the newspaper the other day and she saw "Sarah Piplin-laid by 5000 men" She reported it to the owner of the company as I felt it was not appropriate for a family newspaper. The person at the other end of the line asked the blonde, "are you blonde?" "Yes, how do you know?" she replied. "Because it says Sahara Pipeline, you idiot!"

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Why'd the squirrel fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

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How do you fit 45 Jews into a car? 5 in the car 40 in the ashtray.

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-When is a door not a door? -Never

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Don't go to the last anti-joke page, they're all terrible or repeated I hope this isn't one of them

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Hey, you want to hear an anti-joke? yeah, sure. .....well, too bad!

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Why did Chuck Norris go to Chuck E Cheeses? Because his friend wanted to go.

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What happened on December 7, 1941 in Hawaii? People celebrated the 100th anniversary of December 7, 1841

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There once was a man in Peru, Who dreamt he was eating his shoe. He was promptly taken to the hospital but died from infection.

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I had a joke about a tie, but it wasn't funny.

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di you hear about the man that got his whole left side cut off? no well he died

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What do call someone who kills their own children? Casey Anthony

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Why was Johnny crying? Because... Because... Because... Because... Because... Because of the wonderful things he does.

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Your mother is so fat, that the doctor said, "Go on a diet or you will get a Cardiac Infarction."

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Teacher- "Sally Sue, a sentence that starts with I, please."\ Sally Sue- "I is..." Teacher- "no, no, Sally Sue, when you start with I, you must follow it with am." Sally Sue- "I am the 9th letter of the alphebet."

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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