knock! knock! whos there!?! abandoned baby!

Why didn't Jimmy's mum come to the school play? She had a heart attack

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Its april fools day and a women is in labour and has to rush to the hospital. Her husband couldn't make it so it is just the doctor and her in the delivery room. 4 hours of labour go by and complications arise. 12 hours later she gives birth toa beautiful baby boy. The doctor wipes the baby off and goes to hand it to her but then suddenly pulls it back and kicks it a cross the room. The mother screamed "my baby boy!" and the doctor smiles and says "April fools! It was already dead!"

What's green and has wheels? Grass, I lied about the wheels

Why did the little boy drop his Ice cream? He had no arms(:

What do you call a woman who loves sex and food? A fat wh0re.

Q: What did the twin tower say to the other twin tower? A: I'm falling for you.

How to confuse a blonde. Buy 14 monkeys dye them purple and orange and hide them in her wardrobe

Why did the bunny eat his food

I used to think I was indecisive, but now I am not so sure.

What do you call a bay that got run over by a train? Thomas

Have you seen Stevie Wonder's new house? You haven't? Well neither has he

want to hear a joke? Woman's rights

Why does Kony kidnap infants? To create an Infantry

what is white and black and red all over? a half eaten penguin

How many years old is Chuck Norris? The same amount of years that it has been since he was born.

What did the finger say to the thumb? Nothing, fingers can't talk.

What did the wise old widow across the street get for Hanukkah? Cardiac Arrest.

Why cant Hellen Keller Drive? Because shes a women.

Why did the jew tie his shoes? because his shoes were untied

"Why did the chicken cross the-" "Gosh! Why can't we just live in a world where a chicken can simply cross the road without being questioned about it's motives?!?!" ~McKenna<3

Why couldn't the boy play catch with his dad? His Dad is dead.

Why was the pencil case unzipped? Because it wasn't zipped up.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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