A blonde walks into a library. She is a commerce major.

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where did Bob go during the bombing attacks? All over the walls.

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Why did the pumpkin stop using the jack hammer? Pumpkins cannot use power tools since they are nothing but orange gourds. But, [for sport] say this ‘pumpkin’ was incarnate; one could assume he was done with his demolition work. He then would return the portable drill to the rental facility and get his deposit back.

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What walks like a duck, talks like a duck, but doesn't look like a duck? A horse named Quackie

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a dragon walks into a bar. the bartender says "stop it". the dragon eats the bartender.

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Friend: I said pass the juice, not gas the jews! Hitler: Oh.

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Why did the man get hit by a van? He was blind, and his guide dog was an idiot.

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Turn around.

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your mom is so poor that she is unable to pay for your child care leaving you to have a terrible childhood, troubled adolescence, and eventually lie passed out in an alley after OD'ing off of heroin.

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A whale walks into a bar, everyone says Hey, Ashely!

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I was on Skype with a girl yesterday and she asked "Do you want to see something?" "No," I said "my mom's in the room and she might get a bad interpretation." "I really want you to see this." She said. " No, my mom's still in the room, she'll think I'm weird if you turn out the lights." "Darn I really wanted to see your glow in the dark snuggie."

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Jay Leno: The economy is so bad.. Audience: how bad is it?! Jay Leno: Very bad.

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Bobby walked into a bar. He was then escorted out of the bar and arrested because he was underage.

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What's worse than a bee sting? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? Three bee stings.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems are pointless Refrigerator.

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Knock knock Who's there? Gung chee Gung chee who? That's my full name.

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why didn't little johnny show up to school on friday? little johnny died two months ago from cancer. he hasn't been to school in a year.

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Why couldn't the pirate get into the adult movie? He had just spent the last of his money at Ihop with his friends, and is now regretting ordering two Rooty Tooty Fresh and Fruitys when he was really only hungry for one.

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1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

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Why did the boy die at his Halloween party? He was the victim of a drive-by.

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roses are red, violets are blue, my name is dave, this poem makes no sense, microwave.

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What do yo call four Jewish guys sitting around doing nothing? The Sabbath Day

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How do you find the richest person in Mexico? Google it!

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Why was the black man scared to leave his house? Because he saw a load of mutated zombies outside his door trying to kill him. However, he realised that this was not possible and was not scared anymore. He went outside but got hit by a fridge and died...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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