.""-. |a a \ \ / | '-') ; _/ /_ .'/ ; '. / / |'. \ | | '._\ | | | | | \ \_ _.// jgs '._`""`_.' `""`

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A Mexican walks into an all white people bar. He then proceeds to buy rounds for everyone in the bar. Everyone thanks the mexican and everyone gets back to doing their own thing.

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what does chuck norris use to cut scissors? another scissor.

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BOOBIES!!!!!!!

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Child birth. So easy women can do it.

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A blond, a brunette, and redhead are trapped on an island. They all try to swim across shark infested waters to the mainland. While they're swimming, the blond turns to the redhead and says, "This water is mildly cold." The redhead replies "Yeah."

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So one day a man walks into a bar. The bartender asks him what he would like to drink. He said he would like a glass of water. The bartender said "why come all the way to a bar just to get some water." The man responded "well its a longer walk to the coffee shop."

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I'm Jewish

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Why did the boy have cable? I don't know.

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What's the difference between a BMW and pile of dead babies? I don't have a BMW in my garage.

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Why did the man float in the lake? Because he had more fat than average, so he was very buoyant

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Knock Knock Who's there? Cancer

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How many Jews can you fit in an ash tray? 1 million.

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Knock knock Who's there? Alzhiemers guy Alzhiemers guy who? Knock knock

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That's Racist

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Knock Knock! Who's There? Not Steve Jobs.

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What did the grandson inherit when his grandmother died? Nothing, they both were killed in a tragic car accident.

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There were 3 children: Flower, Petal and Fridge. Flower asked, "Mum, why is my name Flower?" to which she replied "Because a flower was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Petal asked, "Mum, why is my name Petal?" to which she replied "Because a petal was the first thing to fall on you when you were born." Fridge said, "Herp derp dur" to which Fridge's mother replied "Shut up, Fridge."

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i yoused to cry a little when i laughed . then i got raped by a clown.

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whats pink and fluffy? pink fluff. whats blue and fluffy? pink fluff holding its breath.

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yo mamas so fat, she started working out

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What's the difference between red hair and black hair? Redheads vs. blackheads

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What is the difference between a duck?

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Your mother is so stupid she never finished College thus having to work many menial jobs to provide for her family.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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