Goats are like mushrooms. If you shoot a duck, I'm scared of toasters

The doctor said he had good news and bad news. I asked for the bad news first. He said, "You have AIDS. I asked what the good news was. He said "You will only have it about a year."

What's the worst thing a 13 year old could do? Have their Bar Mitzvah in Nazi Germany.

Why couldn't the Chinese man drive? Because he didn't have his driver's license yet.

Why did the boy eat his homework? Because he already ate his dog.

What is the difference between Santa, and a Jew? Santa goes DOWN the chimney

What time is it when an elephant sits on your car? 12:00

Why did the bunny eat his food

two guys are waiting at a train station...6 hours later one guy turns to the other and says "train aint coming"

Why did the tomato blush? It didn't - red is the natural colour for ripe tomatoes.

Roses Are Red Lemons are sour, open up your legs and give me an hour

What did the black man do with the piece of bacon? He ate it.

A: ask me if I'm a truck. B: why? A: just ask me. B: are you a truck? A: no.

See you ******* dogface! All right? You're a compulsive *********** sit on that swivel! Stop swearing!

Why was six afraid of seven? Seven was a rapist

Why did the chiocken cross the road? There's no such thing as a chiocken.

What's the difference between a lamborghini and a pile of dead babies? I don't have a lamborghini in my garage.

How do you fix America's national security issues? Nuke russia

69 HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH *goes crazy and shoots himself*

how many babies can you fit in a bass drum? 19.

what ya call e dong withb eyes peeneyes

Bin Laden comes out of a cave

Your mama so fat, that it's starting to affect her relationship with her husband in a negative or harmful way. (CSC)

How did the chicken cross the road? On it's chicken wings.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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