Why did the tree cross the road? A woman crashed into it.

A grasshopper walks into a bar. The bartender picks up a newspaper and squishes him

Your mom is so stupid she had a hard time graduating high school.

Why can't the dinosaur eat M&M's? He is dead. He used to rule the Earth 65 Million years ago, though. Dinosaurs are reptiles. Whales are not. Meow?

What is the difference between a black guy and shit? One just looks and smells like shit, and the other actually is shit.

What's worse than hearing another Holocaust anti-joke? The Holocaust.

Q;what do you call a fish with two knees and personally HANDS out JOBS A: a blowfish

What do you call a black guy who flies an airplane? A pilot, you racist.

What part of NO can't you understand? The part where you pronounce the 'N'.

What do you call a blind, crippled, child? Unlucky.

A man walks into a bar. He has a drink. Then goes back home.

What's better than winning a medal in the Special Olympics? Not being retarded.

What's red and smells like blue paint? Red paint.

Why did the chicken cross the road?

what did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Where's my tractor?

Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

Why did the chicken cross the road? To get to the other side.

Whats big, yellow and red? a school bus with a bunch of dead children.

What did the boy tell the girl at recess? An anti-joke

how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

Why was Little Billy crying? He had an axe embedded in his chest.

A child is in the grocery checkout with their parents. It sees the candy display and asks for a pack of Reese's. When the parents do not grant the child's request, they begin to scream and cry. When they arrive home, the child is beaten with a copper rod. The new puppy that the child got for a birthday present is hanged and fed to buzzards.

A red house is red. A blue house is blue. What color is the green house? Clear they are made of glass.

Why did the fat guy get a gun? Because he was tired of all the fat jokes...

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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