Stevie Wonder has put on a lot of weight since the 70's. I feel really bad for him because he can't watch what he eats.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What did the boy do when he was cold? Got a blanket.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Why did the girl hang herself? She was constantly bullied in school and on the internet.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Yeah, just went for more ice, its hot as hell here, and yeah its the weather, I dont mind you using valium, is that the same as Xanax? My mum uses it sometimes, she is afraid of heights and well, has to fly a lot so its complicated, if you dont mind, I have always wanted to know more about you so shall we?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Congratulations you just won a greencard to the USA! YES YOU BETTER BELIEVE IT! WELCOME TO: UNCLEAN SOUTH ARABIA. Press green thumb below = greencard. no srslsy.

thumb_up thumb_down +29

Hey, look under there! Under what?

thumb_up thumb_down +29

How do you kill a black guy With a gun

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What's small, yellow and great with numbers? A yellow calculator

thumb_up thumb_down +29

What has 5 legs, 4 eyes, and 8 stomachs? Nothing.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's brown and sticky? Poo

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What is green and red and spins around? A frog in a blender

thumb_up thumb_down +27

What's the difference between Barney the dinosaur and Santa? Barney loves you.

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why should people with Alzheimer's not tell jokes? .......................................................................................................................................... SEVEN EIGHT NINE!!!!!

thumb_up thumb_down +27

Why did Susie fall off her swing? She had no arms Nock nock Who's there? Not Susie.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Three blondes walk into a community college.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

How did the chicken get to the other side? He didnt, he got ran over.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

A black man and a mexican jump from a tree. Who hits the ground first? The mexican. The black man had a rope tied around his neck.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Whats the difference between a blonde and a mosquito? A blonde is a Homo sapien (Latin for knowing man), a primate species of mammal with a highly developed brain, belonging to the family of great apes, along with chimpanzees, bonobos, gorillas, and orangutans . A mosquito on the other hand is a common insect in the family Culicidae (from the Latin culex meaning midge or gnat).

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why do girls wear perfume? Because they smell and they're ugly

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because it was dead.

thumb_up thumb_down +25

how do you make a plumber cry Kill his family

thumb_up thumb_down +25

Why did a guy with schizophrenia does it take to walks into a bar.

thumb_up thumb_down +23

can't wait until the baby boomers die

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Can I touch it?

thumb_up thumb_down +23

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops