Why did the man buy a large butcher knife and a shot gun at 3am while his family was asleep at home? because he suffered from insomnia and figured running some errands would give him something to do. his wife had also been telling him that their current knife was getting old and rather dull and since one of his favorite hobbies was duck hunting he decided it wouldn't hurt to buy a new gun considering it was on sale for a reasonable price

thumb_up thumb_down +2

What's the difference between two black people? Ones a little mocha caramel.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Your mother is so fat that she has diabetes

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Why did Tommy get a wedgie? He was gay, and his parens were dead, so the school bully,decided to wedge his underwear up his butt.

thumb_up thumb_down +2

Ryan Chang is funny.

thumb_up thumb_down

What does KFC stand for? Kids Fattening Center

thumb_up thumb_down

why was the snowman so happy? because a child placed pieces of coal in a "u" shape on it.

thumb_up thumb_down

why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a salad. salads can't fly planes.

thumb_up thumb_down

What's brown and sticky? Poop.

thumb_up thumb_down

Why did the man drink the milk? Because he was a baby.

thumb_up thumb_down

how do you annoy people? make statuses from anti-joke.com

thumb_up thumb_down

A traveler gets a flat tire on an old farm road. He goes to the door of the neasrest farm and knocks. The farmer and his beautiful 21 year old daughter answer the door. Traveler: "I'm sorry, but I have a flat. Is there any place I can stay until I get it repaired?" Farmer: "Why yes. Our church sponsors a homeless shelter and rehab center down the road.I can give you a ride there if you like?"

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How do magnets work?

thumb_up thumb_down -2

Why did Eve eat the fruit first? Because women are whores.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

A fat guy at starbucks, waiting for his regular 160lbs breakfest. why is the 10 black kid crying? he's hungry and there is no starbucks in somalia .

thumb_up thumb_down -2

How many blondes does it take to screw in a lightbulb? It should only take one person to do this job regardless of hair color.

thumb_up thumb_down -2

why is 6 afraid of 7 ? because 7 is black.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

Why do black people suck? Because they're black

thumb_up thumb_down -4

What is brown and sticky? The substance used to line your stomach when getting your stomach pumped.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

what's the hardest part about microwaving a baby? holding the camera and masturbating

thumb_up thumb_down -4

I grammer is gooder then yours.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

The bird is not the word.... Its two

thumb_up thumb_down -4

A man walks into a bar. He hit his head so hard that he went into a coma.

thumb_up thumb_down -4

maddie latino

thumb_up thumb_down -6

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops