Turn around.

If a wheel falls off a bus whilst travelling down a river, how long does it take to shingle a doghouse? None, because there are no bones in cottage cheese.

What other than water contains H2O? The condensation reaction between two alpha glucose molecules to form Maltose.

Q. On a scale of 1-100, how immature are you? A. 69.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=2qg6AkhIYVs

Why did Doris fall down the stairs? Because she was a stupid, uncoordinated old hag with no control over her bladder.

A blonde, a redhead, and a brunette were driving on a highway. The redhead asked the brunette, who had the map, which was the next exit. The blonde was better with maps so she took it and announced where to go. They made the exit and enjoyed a nice lunch.

A Kid goes to Band Camp and comes back distinctly better at the Trumpet.

How many dull people does it take to replace a lightbulb? One.

1500 Jews were ordered to walk along a straight path whilst in the midst of a blizzard. How close did they ever get to the end? What end? They marched until every last bit of their rotten flesh was driven from their weak bodies. --ZeNaziGermanDoctor

What are the things that define you? The things that define you.

Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

Two Jewish kids walked into a bar... mitzvot.

whats the differnce between a corvette and a pile of dead babies??? i dont have a corvette in my garage.

dave lee travis walks into a radio station , plays some records , talks randomly , and a good time is had by all.

Q: Why did the plane crash into a mountain? A: The pilot was a tomato.

What do black people eat for breakfast? Cereal.

Knock knock Who's there? Gung chee Gung chee who? That's my full name.

Why do you walk to your bed at night? Beds cant walk.

I have adhd theref- hey look a dandelion

Which came first, The chicken or the egg? Well, Firstly, I suppose that depends on if we are discussing Creation or Evolution. If we are talking about Evolution, The Chicken must Logically have evolved from an egg laying creature, one which was similar to, but not quite a chicken, so, the first chicken hatched from the egg of said creature. However, if we are discussing Creation, there is no way to discern which the deity in question decided to create first, so, even odds. Therefore, Logically, there is a 75% chance the Egg came first. However, if we are discussing Chicken Eggs Specifically, the reverse is true, because the egg the first Chicken hatched from would not have been a chicken egg, it would have been the egg of another creature, a "proto-chicken" if you will. and so, in the evolution scenario, the Chicken came first. Still, in this situation, there are even odds as to which a creator may or may not have created first. Therefore, Logically, in this Scenario, there is a 75% chance that the Chicken came first

Q: why are black people good at basketball? A: because they practice

K

what do you do when a woman tells you no? cut her tongue out

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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