Q. What's the difference between a movie star and a manikin? A. Nothing.

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A man walks into a bar. Ouch.

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How many dead babies can fit in a bathtub. Twelve. A previous joke said seventeen, that person had their facts wrong. I know from experience

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Nevermind.

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What's the difference between a duck and a goose? They are obviously different species but they both have wings and are birds and are actually pretty similar. Geese are usually bigger though I guess.

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Whats another word for Thesaurus?

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THere was three bees eating Honeynut cherrios one of them had a speech impediment.

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A man waltzes into a bar, waving a carrot in the air. With an arrogant air of self-importance he flops onto a highchair at the bar. Looka here, looka here, he says to the bartender, waiving the carrot at the man. Will you buy me drinks all night, if I can make this carrot... Never mind, and please leave my bar, the bartender says, pulling out a carrot from under the counter. I've got one myself.

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What did the robot say to the centipede? STOP BEING A CENTIPEDE!!!! It's funny cause the robot ain't got no arms.

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What is the difference between a hore and a wife? The hore serves you...

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Where does Frosty the Snowman keep his money? He doesn't keep it. His lifespan is too short to make significant compound intrest.

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An Italian, a black man, and a small child walk into a bar. Shortly after it blew up due to a gas leak. 67 people perished.

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What is the square root of 69? 8.306623863

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How many women does it take to change a lightbulb? None, let the bitch cook in the dark.

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Where did the Welsh man work? At an office complex.

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how do you wake up lady gaga? scream in her ear.

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What's the difference between me and a ghost? Ghosts aren't Dolphins!

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What did the Catholic Priest do to the 9-year-old boy? He ate him. The priest was actually Jeffery Dahmer.

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What did the little boy with cancer get for Christmas? Death

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A Jew sits down next to a muslim at the bar. They great and discuss their day's events, they both order beers. Then they go home.

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What do you say to a man who isnt funny You're not fuuny

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why do black people hate chainsaws? the noise they make- run nigga nigga run nigga nigga run nigga nigga

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Knock Knock Who's there? re-posession officers

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What happens when you push an asian in a hole? He falls in

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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