How do you kill a blonde? Put a scratch-n-sniff sticker at the bottom of a pool.

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No, but it was a nice chance to pretend to, that was the scheme part I might have mentioned, people never figure out that you are fucking them over at the present, if you tell them you fucked them off in the past, they start thinking backwards, often ignoring those tiny details straight in front of them. Listen, call me a bit paranoid, but who the hell is Septimus and AzureDragon or whatever the fuck his little geek name was?

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JESUS SAYS PICTURE HERE ..... Throws a party for 12 people the world still talks about 2012 years latter !

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Do you need any assistance?

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Why did the dog die? I beat him with a bat

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What did the kid use to smell his food His nose

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Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead-

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What is the best school in Victoria? Lyndale.

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Whats black and has wheels a black man i lied about the wheels

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What did the skeleton say to the man? Nothing.

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An Irish man willingly walks out of a bar

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Take my wife- to the store.

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What's worse than stubbing your toe? Watching your house burn down and your family scream in pain as their flesh burns and you suffer from chronic depression.

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I'm going to Re-write History... History

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How do you make a fat kid cry? You hold an onion up to their face.

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Funny joke to play on an elderly woman: Take her cane and push her In front of a bus.

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Why did the little girl fall off of the swing? She didn't have any arms.

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Why did the Jew cross the road? He was hungry and there was a McDonalds on the other side of the street.

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What do you call an amazing, funny, beautiful, nice, goreous, stunning girl? Adena Gabrysiak <3

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What starts with a 'D' and ends with 'ick' Daniel and Jimmy are walking in the park when suddenly they get hit by a stick because a mysterious person threw the stick.

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An old lady and her son walk into a hospital, only to find it covered in TRICERITOPS SHIT!!!!

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Early yesterday around 10:23am a local women by the name of Bethany Francis Polluch died from a injury to the head. At the scene investigators discovered a tree fell on her causing the trauma. Believe it or not the tree was in the kitchen.

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Norm Macdonald's roast of Bob Saget.

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I ate a pancake for breakfast not

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops