Roses are red, violets are red, daffodils are yellow, and pansies are pink.

Friends are like trees. They fall down when you hit them with an ax.

10 years ago, i man got cancer. He recovered and now leads a normal life.

why did the chicken cross the road?? to go shopping for some aspirin because one of his children recently developed a raging headache and it was only logical for him to go to the pharmacy that was conveniantly placed across the road.

A woman walks into a bar. She gets hit on by every guy in the bar. After hours of being hit on she finally has enough and asks the guys to stop. The guys Say "ok im sorry". She leaves.

Why was Superman white? Because Jerry Siegel is a racist.

What do you get when you cross an elephant and a rhino? Photoshop

Chuck Norris drove to McDonalds and ordered a Whopper. Much to his dismay, McDonalds does not make Whoppers, because that is the signature fast-food burger of McDonald's biggest competitor, Burger King.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Because he was forced, along with thousands of his poultry counterparts, on a march to meet their imminent death at a mass slaughterhouse. Upon being beheaded and processed, the meaty corpse was delivered to a local grocery store and cooked into a wholesome family dinner.

boobs

why is 4 afraid of 5? Because Monkey's eat purple pineapples

A Mexican, A Jew and a Irishman walk into a grocery store...The Mexican buys some bread, the Jew buys some bread... and the Irishman buys some bread.

What's the difference between your dog and your mother? Your dog doesn't think you're a disgrace to the family

Why was poor justin killed His mother kicked him into a pool of blood-thirsty aligators.

Womens' rights.

why did the chicken cross the road Why not

What do you call a pig with 57 nipples? 3 more nipples and you can call it a 60 nippled-pig

Hello we are from the church of the latter day saints.

Q: What did the rectum say to the Anus? A: "Your a waste."

Justin Beiber does not have a really good voice.

Why did Sally fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock knock. Who's there? Not Sally.

A blonde walks into an electronics store. She asks the clerk how much a television costs. He said that they don't serve blondes. The blonde files a lawsuit and is victorious by ruling of descrimination.

Roses are bacon Violets are red I have a gun I'm not very original.

Hey Patrick Yeah? I found something funnier then 24 Give it to me buddy 25

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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